I just want to feel okay again

I'm sick and tired of doubting myself.
I'm sick and tired of trying to figure out what it is that has kept me in this place.
I used to think it was the people, but evidently it isn't, because everyone has settled but I'm still here.
The outside.
And from the looks of things, the wall's just getting higher, and I'm just sick of having to stand on my tippy toes to pretend that I'm part of what's within.
But we all know the truth, don't we.
And I want so badly to move on, but I'm afraid as hell to do so.
Afraid as hell.
Scared.
Scarred.
Becuase if I can't find my place in my comfort zone, what's to say that I'm gonna do any better outside of it?
I'm sick and tired of this, and I don't know how long more I'm going to bother trying.
It's just like another whip across the back every time.